Mental Recession

2008-11-26T07:33:00.001-08:00

To take chances even when the circumstances are against you,
When you feel that everything may just fall apart.
You put yourself on the line for something that might not be true,
And you don't know the right distance to go far.

Fear, of getting hurt, lost, rejected
and having a mind that makes you think too much
For better or for worse, should you use your head
Successful in other areas, but scared of this such

You have nothing to lose but yourself and your heart
Tears have no monetary value when it comes to it
Everything may once again just fall apart
In the end, it might all be worth it

The Uncontrollable

2008-02-25T19:20:00.000-08:00

Things don’t always go the way we plan. In fact, they rarely do. Maybe you’re not at the right point of your career; maybe your marriage just isn’t working out; maybe you can’t seem to find your place in the world. One thing’s for sure, though: you didn’t want it to be this way at all and there is nothing you can do about it.

Circumstances force us to be where we are at a certain point in time. Nothing we can do to change that. But that doesn’t mean that there is nothing we can do to change what’s gonna happen tomorrow. A fortune teller told of an ill future, but parted saying that there’s always something we can do to change that future; and I don’t see the ill fortune realizing itself.

There are two kinds of factors. The X and the Y, the things we can’t control and the things we can. For the things we can’t control, too bad. We can’t change what we are today and we shouldn’t stress ourselves thinking of things that ‘could have been’ or ‘shouldn’t have been’, the only thing we can do is change things for the future. Not with the factors that forced us to be where we are; but the factors that we can control.

Focus on the things we can control, for those are our only hope. Do your best not for your past, but for your future.

Death of a Wizard

2008-02-24T00:11:00.000-08:00

My Wizard is now dead.

I own(ed) an HTC Wizard, my first actual Windows Mobile 5 phone that lasted more than six months in my hands. Other times I'd just have phones last barely a month due to the fact that I prefer profit over usability. But the phone that got me into the usability, my HTC Wizard, my second love, died.

Ironically, I just received my new phone three days prior to this happening. My Asus P525 became my new toy. It got all the pampering, upgrading, software, and tweaks that any phone would long for. I guess my Wizard got jealous; it felt replaced; deserted; unloved.

It seems like the cycle of life applies to electronics too. In with the new, out with the old. You don't even have a choice, if there's the new, the out has to leave; whether you like it or not. I say this because I miss the old times. I chatted with one of my old friends earlier and while I missed her badly, she reminded me that I have a lot of things in my life now. She's leaving the Philippines soon. I hope I can see her again.

Well, right now I'm on my Asus EEE (Shamplafaboo) typing a blog entry, downloading pictures in a zip file, synchronizing my Asus P525 (Pautavus), realizing that it's very geeky to give names to your devices, waiting for my girlfriend to arrive so that I can have dinner, charging my broken HTC Wizard, downloading Season 4 of One Tree Hill and the US Top 40 Chart WE 022308, and signing on to my YM.

Death of a Wizard

2008-02-23T23:59:00.000-08:00

2007-04-27T20:37:00.000-07:00

I've moved my blog to:

http://jasonkd.blogs.friendster.com/my_blog/

2006-09-09T05:51:00.000-07:00

The tip of the iceburg.

That's what best describes the lives that we are aware of. In fact, we are much smarter than we really seem to be. The average person actually uses just around 10% of his brain capacity, which means that we are all either highly intelligent beings beyond our instant imaginations or that we are a greatly underdeveloped species with years of evolution left in our times (depending on which side of the glass you're looking at). Nevertheless, we live our lives.

I have read somewhere that there are keys to unlocking our unconscious, but I'm half-awake right now, so you can go looking on the internet for such resources, since you are already on the internet anyway.

2006-09-09T05:47:00.000-07:00

My brain can barely produce the words to express how I feel at the moment. Which either means my brain cells have been dying since I stopped smoking and drinking or my intellectual capacity has been stunted for the past few years. In short, I'm sleepy and bored. I would love to write a highly enlightening piece on life's mysteries, but maybe another time. Maybe I should write more about what happens in a day-to-day sort of style rather than my usual shots of amateur poetry and half-hearted writing. Hmm, at least my brain's working again. :O

2006-08-09T02:43:00.000-07:00

In a slew of useless words about couples fighting, my dad told me something useful today: "There's nothing in the world worth fighting for..."

Ponder for yourself.

Cheers.

2006-08-08T00:26:00.000-07:00

"You are never paid enough money for the work you do. An increase in salary means an increasing incremental amount of stress. I don't envy those CEOs and Presidents of company's; they're balding old men with no life..."
- Jimmy Weng, AIESEC in Taiwan

I believe that turning down a high-stress, high-pay job is actually worth it considering the medium-pay, no-stress environment I am currently in. Maybe I might be just sweet lemoning or just being plain lazy, but there has to be some logic in this all. :)

The problem with a low-stress job is the stress when you arrive home. You must have enough money to put food on the table, with the occassional luxury here and there. When you have a high paying job, you have so much stress at work that you lose your family life.

The perfect job equilibrium between salary and stress should be the minimum pay that you would need to fit your basic family needs (with a few additions). That way you have the least stress and the best family life.

2006-08-07T08:55:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since I've felt the need to update my blog...

Nothing more than a sense of apathy with a dash of laziness could have caused all this. I just have some random thoughts at the moment which are between the lines-able. :)

Isn't it strange how priorities can change? I mean little changes could cause sudden shifts. Namely, the ripple effect: "Notice how you drop a stone in a pond, ripples start to slowly form. Small at first, but gradually increase in size; getting bigger and bigger until it populates the whole pond." Strange how a small event can change your life's direction. Not directly, but through this little thing called motivation, or demotivation to more precise.

2006-05-18T05:17:00.000-07:00

in 10 minuites...

I will cross borders
I will handle a conversation
I will assess the situation
I will determine need
I will position my product
I will create demand
I will compute savings
I will defeat compeition
I will dispel fears
I will negotiate terms

But most of all, and nothing else matter, but only that:
I will accomplish my sale

10 minutes is all I need....
10 minutes is all I get

2006-04-23T15:03:00.000-07:00

In order to be strong, you must first be weak.
In order to live life fully, you must experience death.
In order to cherish, you must first let go...

"Photograph"
-nickelback-

Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye

2006-04-20T10:10:00.000-07:00

As I set here in front of that piece of technology that has become so essential in our daily lives, I feel the winds of change gently seducing my skin. As I stare in the moonlight sky to seek the stars and perhaps the face of my soulmate, it is unseen. Yes, the new moon. As it changes faces, so does the ocean tide, which could bring in the surf for now...

Signs of a new beginning...but what about the old

2006-04-20T09:42:00.000-07:00

A sudden change in plans.

How fragile our life may seem,
So different when we think.
No matter if the crop of cream,
Will rise up or shall sink.

Everything seemed so simpler then,
A one way road - success.
But when thoughts went there and again,
Things turned out such a mess.

One hour, one day, one person, event,
All any could change in one.
When you think that you were meant,
For nothing less than none.

No matter what the turnout is,
Simply cannot regret.
A greater cause, philanthropist,
Fulfillment, you shall bet.

All aspects of one's life shall change,
Interrelation at its best.
In reach are everything, within range,
Peoples hopefulls and the rest.

While pressure is a sad tale,
And discouragement even worse.
Nothing shall get you off your rail,
Not the wildest curse.

I cannot forever lament about tomorrow, for tomorrow will come when today is over and the day shall almost end. A state of mind that leads to emotions: confusion. Fear, anger, frustration, sadness, and depression. All degrees of which regress into the facets of life. But tomorrow will come, and so shall emotions fade with the tides of the ocean. Sadness will be replaced with happiness and loss with discovery. In the end, all shall come to the beginning and back to the end. Today i wallow in my dark corner with my three cards of life, the diamond, heart, and clover. Each interrelated yet independent. If someone could tell me what tomorrow will bring, I do not wish to know. For all is for the best. All is better unknown.

How friends, and foes, and lovers shall know I keep to myself. I have my solace in the forbidden fruit; the tree of life, yet the tree of death. An open book I am, yet the key I keep hidden. As principle I have broken, yet kept in the end. I anticipate what will come, for that is all I can do...

2006-04-14T21:09:00.000-07:00

"I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can..."

Do you all remember "Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends", that old children's animation that promoted the steam engines that highly contributed to the air pollution we now have today? Well, even though it was geared towards little kids (most of us weren't even born at the time), it could teach us life-long lessons; the wisdom of old men and women.

During this one episode, Thomas, the main character in the story, a puppeteered steam engine, was going about his everyday life, of well, chugging down coals to transport people and their belongings (and the occassional zoo and farm animals), between 'train stations' (a piece of technology we unfortunately don't have yet here in Cebu). Until at a certain point in time in the recession of his life, or what we humans call 'middle-age', he couldn't get it going.
This sweet steam engine, Thomas, had his hopes and dreams seemingly washed away from him in that second where he couldn't get it up-err..going. He, or it, was a hopeless case. Nothing could help him. Even the use of stimulants and external tampering couldn't help him. The train operator was left to one conclusion: That mental stress was the primary cause of a psychological malfunction which directly affected the stimulii requried in order to perform certain functions. In other words, it was all in his mind (if trains do have minds). What happened next was a depiction of meditation and zen through the positive reinforcement by the train operator.
Once the train operator jump started Thomas, he kept on repeating to himself words that we all should never forget: "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...". Over and over again, he repeated those words, as if chanting a demonic phrase. Slowly, but surely, his wheels started to move. Faster and faster they went. Until at long last, he could get himself going! The Energizer battery was no match for him as he could travel at speeds of 120kph. Way to go little train! You just learned one of life's most important lessons.

So what does this all mean? How could a simple train overcome his weaknesses? The answer: It's all in the power of the mind.

Remember the quote: "You can do anything once you put your mind to it"? Or better yet, "Once you wish something, the whole universe transpires in order for you to obtain it"? The first quote was true, and the second one was a half-truth. When you truly wish something, deep in your heart, the universe does not conspire and agree on granting your wish, no matter how evil it may be. But your own personal universe makes it happen. Once you set a goal in your heart, mind, and embed it deep into your subconscious, your actions will be geared towards that goal. If you always say to yourself: "I think I can", then you can.

Sheer will and determination. Those are the two traits that you gain with your personal brainwashing. All the factors in your environment that either directly or indirectly affect the way you accomplish your goal will come into play. Even though all of these factors may turn out to be obstacles, if you have the determination, you will overcome these obstacles and accomplish your goal, making use of what you have . Right now, you're on your own. But I'd like to leave with you a couple of thoughts before you battle the demons of life, or school-life, as the situation may be.

Remember how we are taught in our science that everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING, goes through our mind. Pain, pleasure, fear, excitement, contentment, the list goes on. Remember that you control your mind, your mind should not control you. So if everything goes through your mind, and you control your mind, does that mean you can control your emotions and feelings? The answer is yes. You can control not only your emotions, but also you physical and mental state. Once you free your mind, you can forget about pain or fear. I don't want to get all Buddhist on you, and will not delge into details, but I want you to remember my first point: Mind over Matter.
My second point in this post write-up is this: Be aware of your surroundings. Your environment, the factors that directly or indirectly affect you, are all important, and you should be aware of them whenever you are in any situation. Once you are aware of them, you can make them play towards your advantage. One method of doing this is identifying your Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities, and Threats, your personal SWOT analysis. Does not conclude this article, but leaves the rest up to you...

2006-04-14T18:06:00.000-07:00

A little something I wrote for my friend...

A BA Education

A good education requires good teachers; and good teachers are, well, something that isn't quite commonplace in our department. You have to agree that while some teachers could keep you on your toes in BA109, others require that extra shot of espresso to get you through the agonizing lectures of Personnel Management - verbatim from the book that 'borrowed' 80% of its text from a western author (ahh, the true Filipino entrepreneurial spirit: plagiarism with a dash of corruption). I'm not saying that we aren't throughly educated, I'm saying that a thorough education is a matter of luck on that fateful day - enrollment. Better prepare your four leaf clovers, kids.
One of my friends had the magical power of teacher cursing. Whenever a teacher would fail him, he would release his verbal voodoo assault. Which, sad to say, actually workerd...the teachers who actually got sick during those days (don't worry teachers, he's graduated despite your futile attempys to repeatedly fail him).

So, how do we deal with this kind of scum? Well, there's the evaluation system. Or you could always write a letter to the Chairman. But I recall how the most boring teacher known to man had a second wind blown into him when there was someone closely monitoring his evil - suddenly turned good - ways. Are we doomed forever to the fate of our schedules I guess, Mr. Chairman, that is up to you

2006-04-11T19:54:00.000-07:00

"...in five to ten minutes..."

That's a phrase we've all used and thought that it meant "in a short while" or something like that. But if you think of the time frame that it contains, five to ten minutes, that is actually a relatively huge time frame. That's just like saying 1 to 2 hours...or 4 to 8 days...double.

I don't know if the example was the right one to start my argument, but anyway...

When God created the Earth, he created night and day...the waters above and the waters below...life and death. Can you actually imagine what is good without thinking about what is evil? If all we know was good, we would not have a word for good. There is no good without evil, no light without darkness, no death without life. Opposites are complementary and while one cannot live with the other, one cannot live without the other....(reminds me of some sayings about love).

The hard part of it all is finding your complement...your opposite...your yang. (well, this is not actually part of the argument)

Anyhow, what I was really trying to say is that we live in a world of relativity. Everything relative to what another thinks, what the societal norm is. Can you actually say that I am a bad boy without comparing me to a good boy? Can you experience bad-ness without experiencing good-ness? People say that you can only fully experience and appreciate life once you have come close to death. And I'll tell you that you cannot love without hating either....

2006-04-11T09:50:00.000-07:00

Never be afraid to love...

But when you do love, love with all your heart, or not at all. Anything in between is a lie to you, your partner, and your relationship.

For love is absolute, no more and no less...there can be no more and no less. Love is love, unquantifiable, yet repeatedly qualified.

There are many definitions of love...all debatable. So, in that regard, I leave my definition of love for another time...

2006-04-10T07:15:00.000-07:00

This is getting too personal already...but it's by request:

To YYY:

I’m not in love with you…yet

But that doesn’t mean that I never will be.

I’m falling in love with you much faster than I’m used to,

Maybe too fast for me to handle, but I know that I am.

I love what we share and how we are together,

What makes us ‘soulmates’ and how we can just live laughing at anything and I just can’t let go of all that that easily.

If you, however, tell me to go away, I’ll try to, but it’ll be the hardest thing for me to do.

I want to fall in love with you YYY and I want to love you, treat you right, be there for you.

Just give me a chance, and I’ll prove it to you.

I know you’re scared, and I am too.

But as long as we’re in this together, we can do it…

I’m scared of what tomorrow might bring,

But if I face it with you, I feel like everything’s gonna be alright.

There are so many things that we don’t know,

But I want to find out those things with you.

We aren’t in love,

But I want to fall in love with you.

If you give this a chance, and we do things together,

I just know things will work out.

About XXX:

We had a wonderful relationship. One of the best I could ever have in my life. I am not yet over what we had; all our hopes, dreams, aspirations, the love we shared, and how we treated each other; but that doesn’t mean that I still love her. I don’t. But I’m not over what we had. It’s like that. When I see her, there are no feelings of love, hurt, etc. (If I still loved her, there would be those feelings). If you’re wondering about ‘past returns’, it’s that all those great things me and XXXshared, I see the potential to surpass those with you; and that’s why I just can’t back off of you, cuz I know we can be wonderful together. Let’s give it a try. Let me love you and show you how amazing a relationship we can have…

2006-04-10T07:04:00.001-07:00

This is for the incoming LCP of AIESEC Cebu...

Leadership demands respect. Not by asking for respect but by deserving respect with your actions. When you speak and handle meetings, you do so with impact. And when you do say something serious, make sure you really are serious...don't cry wolf with so many demands or jokes, or you lose respect.

I have lost respect of people by being too critical and not being able to substantiate that with my actions. But I have also gained respect of people by working hard. If people see your track record, you will demand the respect you need.